December 16, 2001
1030 Zulu
Austin's Apartment

Rosslyn, Virginia



"I see you decided to scale the Christmas tree again wild thing," Austin called to Daisy who was sleeping sprawled on the back of the sofa. She stooped down to pick several of the ornaments off the floor deciding it was a good thing that she'd left the glass ornaments off the tree for this year. They just wouldn't be safe with Daisy around.

She knelt down beneath the tree to plug in the lights smiling as she went into the kitchen to make coffee. Only a little over a week to go until Christmas and she was done. All her shopping was done and the gifts were wrapped, hidden in her closet of course to keep Daisy from destroying them. She had Christmas cookies in the freezer from her trip to North Carolina at the beginning of December.

True to her word Harriet had brought Austin to a meeting of Navy wives as soon as she was feeling better and Austin had been welcomed in immediately. She'd also found a website:  www.marinewives.com and managed to find ICQ numbers and email addresses for some of the wives at Camp Lejeune. She'd emailed them, explaining who she was and why she was contacting them and had been surprised when the leader of the Wives' Club had called her to invite her to their Christmas celebration on December 1.

Austin had almost declined the invitation, then decided to go after talking about it with Harriet. She had been so happy she had gone. All the other wives and fiancees had welcomed her with open arms being sure to give her all the advice they could since it was her first experience with deployment. Someone had brought along a camcorder and they had each had a chance to record a brief message for their loved one.

They'd baked cookies and packaged most of them to send along with cards, letters and the tape to Afghanistan.

Austin looked out her kitchen window unconsciously wiping a tear from her cheek. It felt so much better to know there were women out there who understood how she was feeling and were ready to support her and talk with her no matter what time it was.

"Okay Bradford...cut the tears. You have about a million things to do today, none of which include crying over the kitchen sink," Austin counseled herself turning to the business of making coffee.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0700 Mountain Time (MT)
Galindez Home
Taos, New Mexico...



Teresa Galindez sat at her kitchen table looking at the letter she had gotten from her son not sure exactly how she felt about it. She lifted it again reading it for the thousandth time since she'd received it yesterday.

Mama,

I hope this letter finds you well. I'm fine. I spend most of my time walking around on patrol. I've sort of been adopted by a village I think. I brought them some food once after bandits took what they had. I'm learning Farsi, the language they speak here, so we can communicate a little bit.

I miss you Mama, and the girls. I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, but I miss Austin most of all. She's practically all I can think about. I worry if she's all right and getting enough rest and enough to eat. I'm so thankful you and Maria spent Thanksgiving with her.

Mama, I know you won't think I'm nuts for this, at least I hope you won't. I want to marry Austin. I love her Mama, I know I do and nothing is ever going to change that. Do you think it would be okay if I gave her Grandmother's engagement ring? I don't know when I'm going to be coming stateside, but when I do I'm going to visit you and the girls first. I'll understand Mama, if you don't want me to give her Grandmother's ring, but think about it please.

I have to go. I'm supposed to be on patrol in 5 minutes.

I love you,

Victor


Teresa sighed and put the letter down. Of course she wanted Victor to give his grandmother's ring to the woman he married. She liked Austin too, the young woman was bright and obviously in love with her son. Something about Victor's letter bothered her though, as if there was something he wasn't telling her that was just below the words he had written. Maybe she'd let Maria read the letter later. Maria was good at reading her brother and knowing what he wasn't saying.

In the mean time she had things to do. There was plenty of baking yet to do and she wanted to be sure to give the house a thorough top-to-bottom scrubbing in the next week before Austin came to celebrate Christmas with them. Maybe she'd even show her the ring and see what the younger woman thought of it.

***************************************************************

Christmas Day

0600 MST
Galindez Home
Taos, New Mexico

Teresa Galindez hummed softly to herself as she put the finishing touches on several of the dishes she was planning to serve her family for dinner later on that day. She knew she would have a houseful: everyone wanted to come scrutinize Victor's girlfriend. She made a mental note to herself to be sure that she or one of the girls was always with Austin to keep her safe from the interrogation she was sure to go through if any of her sisters could corner the young woman.

She had arrived two days ago smiling happily, though still looking too thin and pale for Teresa's comfort. She had made it her mission to feed Austin so she could send her back home healthier than when she'd come.

Ah, there she is, Teresa thought to herself with a smile when she heard soft footfalls coming down the hallway. "Feliz Navidad, Austin."

"Merry Christmas," Austin answered sleepily pushing her hands through the sleeves of Victor's sweatshirt.

"Did you sleep well?" Teresa questioned handing her a mug of coffee.

"Very well. Victor's bed is so comfortable," Austin sighed wistfully.

"It would be even more comfortable with Victor in it though wouldn't it?"

Austin flushed looking into her coffee cup. "I'm pretty transparent I guess."

"You're in love, there is nothing wrong with that. And I know you and Victor were living together. You make him happy, that is my biggest concern."

"Mine too...oh I wish he would come home."

Teresa smiled and patted Austin's arm as she passed by her to turn the radio on low so Christmas carols flooded the kitchen.

"Mrs.- Mama, do you think you could teach me to cook some of Victor's favorite dishes before I leave?" Austin stumbled over the form of address she used with Victor's mother. The older woman had insisted that she call her Mama, but it just didn't feel natural to her.

"I would love that!" Teresa clapped her hands together in delight. "None of my girls want to learn to cook...they all tell me it's easier to buy frozen, packaged things."

"And we all know that eating prepackaged foods will send us straight to hell," Maria teased her mother as she emerged from her old room.

"Maria! Do not joke of Hell in my home!" Teresa scolded.

"Who's joking? Merry Christmas Austin."

"Merry Christmas."

"Wearing Vic's clothes, huh?" Maria asked with a smile recognizing the flannel boxers with bears on them as ones she had given her brother as a gag gift one Christmas.

Austin nodded wrapping her arms around herself as she stood to walk over to one of the windows. She missed him so much right now. She'd cried herself to sleep the night before after she'd seen a bottle of aftershave on his dresser and sniffed it out of curiosity. It was the stuff he wore currently and it reminded her of being held tightly in his arms her face pressed against his shoulder.

"Umm...I was going to go for a jog before breakfast and everyone arrives. Would you like to come with me Austin?" Maria questioned wanting to try and cheer her up.

"Sure, just let me go get dressed."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kandahar, Afghanistan



Victor shifted on the hard bench he was sitting on rubbing his face to get rid of the last of his sleepiness. The CO had ordered all the men to gather saying he had something special for them in honor of Christmas. He hoped it wasn't "It's a Wonderful Life" or some sappy movie like that...if it was he was going to head back to his pallet for more sleep.

"We got a care package a few days ago from home...said don't open until Christmas," The CO announced as he walked around the front of the room watching as an eager look spread on the faces of the men before him. "Well it's Christmas...so let's see what we got!"

Victor watched as the box was opened smiling as the cookies were pulled out then a tape and finally cards and letters. He clapped and cheered for the guys who were called forward to claim their envelopes figuring he wasn't going to be getting anything.

"Galindez, you got something here."

Victor got to his feet pushing carefully through the men sharing their cards and the photos inside to the CO who handed him a card. He looked at the envelope practically beaming at Austin's neat handwriting.

"Gunnery Sergeant Victor Galindez, USMC," He whispered softly to himself carrying the envelope back to a quiet corner before opening it up.

The card was pure Austin. A cartoon penguin was on the front looking hung over as he stared intently down into a pair of briefs he was wearing. Be careful how you celebrate the holidays Victor read to himself before flipping the card open careful not to let the photos inside slide to the floor so you don't have to wonder how you wound up with mistletoe in your jockey shorts.

He chuckled shaking his head, leave it to Aus to send him something like that. He turned his attention to the photos. She's included one of Bud, Harriet and Little AJ, one of her Christmas tree and the last one which made his breath catch in his throat. Austin sitting on the sofa in her apartment beaming for the camera holding a small black kitten wearing reindeer antlers in her arms. He turned it over. Merry Christmas Vic, Love Aus and Daisy. A similar wish for a Merry Christmas was on the back of the photo the Roberts' photo and Victor sighed deeply turning back to the card.

"Vic, I couldn't get you a mushy, romantic cardevery one I looked at made me cry. This one made me laugh and I thought you might like it. I'll be spending Christmas with your Mother and sisters now that I seem to have my ulcer under control. I wish we could be together for the holidays, but since you're always in my heart I guess we are together in some way :) . I love you Victor with all my heart and I miss you so much it hurts. I'm waiting for you Marine. Come home soon. Hugs and Kisses, Aus."

"Let's take a look at that tape," The CO suggested several minutes later. "And help yourselves to the cookiesthere's a ton of 'em!"

Victor watched the tape intently as it played nearly sitting on the edge of the bench, arms resting on his knees, waiting for a glimpse of Austin.

Finally, there she was. Smiling, though her nose and cheeks were red. "Hi VictorI'm fine. Everything here is going well. Stay safe and come home soon. I'm s-savingthe real estate section of the s-Sunday papers. Love y-you."

Not half as much as I love you, Victor thought looking down at his card again. Not even half as much as I love you.

*************************************************************

February 14, 2002
1200 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia



"Ah, someone else who decided to come in early and take advantage of being able to use the copier without waiting in line," Harm teased as he walked past Austin.

"Good morning Commander Rabb."

"Good morning to you too Miss Bradford," Harm grinned pouring himself a cup of coffee. He took a sip bracing himself just in case the Admiral had made it again. 

"Don't worry," Austin said seeing Harm bracing himself from the corner of her eye. "I told the Admiral I'd be happy to make the coffee this morning. I don't think my nerves could take another cup of the stuff he makes."

"Thank God for small favors," Harm replied. "So have you heard from Gunny lately?"

"Over the weekend I'm supposed to go back to Camp Lejeune...the Wives' Club has a tape from the men."

"Miss Bradford, Commander Rabb: the Admiral needs to see you in his office."

"Both of us? Hmmm, wonder what this is about?" Austin asked the handsome aviator as he motioned her to go through the door first as they crossed the bullpen.

They entered to find Mac there all ready.

"Good, you're all here. We have a situation people. Do you remember Seaman Fletcher Miss Bradford?"

"Yes Admiral I do. I was his daughter Danielle's Case Manager when I first took the EFMP position. Now Lieutenant Farrow works as her case manager"

"I received a report from his base Commander this morning," AJ stopped and removed his reading glasses handing the report over the desk to Austin.

Austin took it keeping her face composed and neutral as she read, though she was unable too hide her gasp. "Danielle was struck by a car last night? Why wasn't I called?"

"I imagine because at the time base security was too busy pulling Seaman Fletcher off Petty Officer Hunter to even think of anything like that. What that report doesn't tell you is that the little girl died early this morning."

"Sir, that's horrible! I assume we're here because we will be handling the investigation," Mac questioned.

"Yes Colonel Mackenzie you will be defending Petty Officer Hunter, Rabb you'll prosecute. I don't think I need to tell either of you that you will tread lightly in this case. Mrs. Fletcher is under suicide watch at Bethesda and Seaman Fletcher is threatening to kill PO Hunter the next time he sees him."

"Admiral, I don't understand exactly why I'm involved in this," Austin said hesitantly.

"PO Hunter is claiming the child was outside alone when she darted into the road. If that is true we are looking at neglect charges against the parents and I'm sure the Commonwealth of Virginia Child Protective Services will jump on that. I want you to be the liaison between JAG and the State."

"Of course Admiral."

"All right people, dismissed."

Austin waited outside the Admiral's office for Harm and Mac. "If either of you need my help please let me know."

"We'll probably want you present when we talk with Lieutenant Farrow as well as the Fletchers," Mac answered patting Austin's arm briefly. "I'm so sorry."

"Me too," Austin sighed heading for her office. She was going to need to talk to Danielle's case manager as soon as possible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


0445 Zulu
Austin's Apartment
Rosslyn, Virginia



Austin closed the case file she'd been poring over not liking the picture she was getting. According to medical reports, Danielle had shown evidence of recent bruising at her last checkup. She was not a particularly coordinated child and her equilibrium was off which effected her balance. The bruises might be able to be explained that way...Austin fervently hoped that was true. She didn't think Lieutenant Tracy Farrow would be able to stand it if abuse was uncovered.

The young Lieutenant had been in tears when Austin had spoken with her and blamed herself for the incident though she was certainly not responsible. Things just weren't adding up and the picture Austin was getting in her mind was making her nervous.

She pushed to her feet from the sofa wandering into the kitchen to look in the refrigerator. Nothing looked remotely appealing and she decided to just go to bed, hoping by morning she'd have figured out some way to keep this case from the media as SecNav had requested.

Daisy followed her into the bedroom meowing loudly and at length about the fact she had been all but ignored all evening.

"Oh stop...sometimes I have to work and I don't have all evening to pamper you. Besides, it's Valentine's Day and you didn't get me anything," Austin scolded the kitten who was busily making herself a nest in the middle of the bed. Austin slipped out of the suit she'd worn to work, hanging it up with the other clothes she needed to remember to bring to the dry cleaners.

Austin got into bed turning off the light too tired to even want to read as she usually did every night before she slept. She stroked Daisy's soft fur while she let her mind drift away from her job and onto more pleasant topics.

Victor...thoughts of him made her smile now rather than cry. The Wives' club had helped with that. That and hearing that a decision had been made that the men in Victor's unit in Afghanistan would probably not be on deployment longer than nine months which meant he might be coming home in July.

Harriet was a huge help too. Bud was gone now as well, acting JAG aboard the Seahawk. So the two women spent even more time together than before.

"It's good to have friends."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Village near Kandahar, Afghanistan



"You are not of this village. Why are you here?"

Victor turned bringing his gun up into the ready position cursing himself for getting so involved in unpacking the food he'd brought that he'd not been paying attention. That was a good way to end up dead.

Standing before him was a woman, about Austin's height with long dark hair, eyes flashing with life and intelligence. "I'm here delivering food. Who are you?"

"Fareeza Tarik. I am an historian. You are American?"

Victor nodded holding out his hand for her to shake. "Gunnery Sergeant Victor Galindez."

"What exactly is it that your people hope to accomplish here? Overthrowing the Taliban government will not necessarily improve things here. It will not put a stop to Al Quaida or their mission."

"I follow orders Miss Tarik, I don't plan strategy," Victor answered flatly. He didn't want to try to defend what the US was doing. He believed in the cause and for him that was enough. Let the Officers worry about strategy.

"Well I did not mean to offend you."

"You didn't Miss, but I need to get this done and get back."

Fareeza shrugged and walked away.

Victor watched her go out of the corner of his eyes. She was one of the first women he had seen not dressed head to toe in traditional dress with her face hidden.

"Fareeza,"  he whispered softly trying the name out. It was pretty, different, but pretty.  He put her out of his mind letting his thoughts wander back to Austin as he finished unloading the food.

****************************************************************

1950 Zulu

Camp Lejeune Wives' Club Gathering
Jacksonville, North Carolina



"Hi Austin, we're so glad you could make it today!"

"It's nice to be here," Austin smiled slipping out of her coat as she surveyed the gathered group of women. It was nice to know she was away from home for the evening and she could rest and relax and not think about the Fletcher case until Monday when she met with Harm and Mac again to talk about what they had found in their investigation.

She had been looking into the case making sure Lt. Farrow had followed proper procedures and there was no chance anything could come up which would bring the EFMP under question. So far everything looked good from the standpoint of paperwork and procedure, but something about the case still bothered her immensely.

She shook the thought away smiling as she mingled and talked with the other wives catching up on what had been going on and letting everyone know what was going on in her life.

"All right everyone...let's gather round and get to the reason we're all here today! We have a tape to watch. There are plenty of Kleenex handy so don't hesitate to let your feelings show ladies."

Austin settled beside a young pregnant woman.

"Hi, Im Heather Alston."

"Hello, Austin Bradford."

"I'm so excited to see Ray again...it feels like it's been years. I wonder if he's excited about our baby? I told him about it on the tape we sent for Christmas...I hope he mentions it!" Heather bubbled obviously thrilled by the whole experience.

Austin smiled thinking how young the woman beside her seemed. All she wanted was to see Victor's face and hear his voice just so she would know he was really all right. She let her mind wander while the other women got messages from their loved ones, her attention focusing in a split second when she heard a familiar clearing of the throat.

"Hey Aus. Loved your Christmas card and the pictures. Daisy's really cute. You looked beautiful honey. Take care of yourself. Give everyone at JAG Ops my best. Te Amo."

Austin had started in shock when she'd seen the man on the screen. His hair was longer, he was dressed in what she assumed must have been clothing the Afghan people would wear and he had a beard.  She was so used to seeing Victor with a military-style haircut, clean-shaven, neat and pressed in his uniform at first she couldn't believe it was him. Hmmm, she thought to herself smiling at the grin he was sporting, he's even sexier scruffy than he is all spit-polished.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0035 Zulu
Harm's Apartment
North of Union Station, DC



"Hey Mac, c'mon in...the pizza's here. One half vegetarian...the other half dead animal delight," Harm teased as he helped his partner take off her coat.

"You are so funny Sailor...I'm forgetting to laugh," Mac teased  back setting her briefcase on the counter before she walked to the refrigerator to get herself a bottle of water.

"Let's eat then we'll talk about the case," Harm suggested carrying the pizza box to the table.

"Sounds good to me...I'm starving!"

They talked about trivial things while they ate, laughing as they speculated what outrageous thing Singer was going to try next to antagonize everyone.

"I thought our dear Lieutenant was in for a strangling when she told that new aide to take Gunny's desk," Harm laughed. "You could practically see the steam rolling out of Austin's ears."

"Ooh...Austin?? Since when are you on a first name basis with her?" Mac teased.

"Since she threatened me with serious bodily harm if I called her Miss Bradford outside the office. I'm not even going to mess with her, I know she could chew me up and spit me out."

"Like she did while you were questioning Danielle Fletcher's case manager?" Mac asked sweetly.

"That was mild from what I've heard. Tiner said she really went after Commander Lindsay one day and he looked like he'd seen a ghost when he left," Harm related.

"Can't say I'm sorry to hear someone is putting him in his place. Okay, let's get on with the case Flyboy."

"Right...I have a copy of Danielle's case file right here. We should review it."

"Yeah, and I have the notes Austin gave us on what we'll find in the Evaluation Report and the Family Service Plan."

Harm nodded and leaned back in his chair. "You know if Singer had any idea we were doing this she'd be in the Admiral's office ratting us out."

"Why? All we're doing is going over the case file together: we're not discussing our strategies or anything. There's nothing wrong with reviewing information together as long as we don't discuss it."

"Easy Mac, I was just saying..."

"I know," Mac blew out a breath. "Someday Singer is going to go one step too far and someone is going to give her what she deserves."

"Murder is still illegal...but I bet we could make a good case for justifiable homicide."

"You missed your true calling Flyboy...you should have been a comedian."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kandahar, Afghanistan



The CO had assigned Victor to work in the village for the past few days figuring it was in his best interest to have some of the locals on their side. Victor didn't mind following orders, but he was having a hard time with other aspects of the assignment.

Fareeza Tarik was his biggest problem. She was in the village taking down the stories of the people there so they wouldn't be lost forever in the power plays between the Terrorist groups and the US. Everywhere he went in the village he found her.

Not that there was a problem between the two of them, but Victor was feeling more and more uncomfortable every time he saw her. It was making his concentration slip, she was a woman, undeniably so, but she didn't seem soft or weak at all. Kind of like Austin. Fareeza could stand up for herself and take care of herself and she never tried to hide that.

Every time his mind conjured up the comparison guilt flooded through Victor. He'd felt guilty enough to write Austin a letter which he'd sent with the team going to get supplies for the camp.

Finally early Monday morning, Victor stumbled into the sleeping hut collapsing tiredly to his makeshift bed. He lay there drifting to sleep while and for the first time since he had been in country, visions of someone other than Austin were dancing in his head.

**************************************************************

A week later
Kandahar, Afghanistan



"Is there a particular reason why you are avoiding me Gunnery Sergeant?"

Victor froze in his steps. God he'd hoped not to see Fareeza today. He'd even chosen to skip sleeping until early afternoon to make that happen. Usually in the mornings Fareeza went to small farms outside the village to collect her data. The fact that he knew her schedule so well only made him feel guiltier Victor thought as he turned to face her.

"I'm not avoiding you...I haven't had any sleep yet today."

"You don't look like you've had any sleep in several days...though you look more like you could be a native now...as long as you don't speak," Fareeza answered.

"My Farsi isn't that bad," he grumbled immediately on the defensive.

"I won't keep you from your sleep...obviously you need it."

He tossed and turned for over an hour unable to relax enough to sleep. God he wanted to go home. Maybe then he could get the images of Fareeza out of his mind before he did something he would live to regret for the rest of his life.

Victor had tried to convince himself that he was beyond the hormonal adolescent stage of reacting to anything in a skirt, but the longer he worked with Fareeza the worse it became. There was no denying that he was attracted to her and try though he might he could find no way to get her out of his mind. Austin still held his heart, but she wasn't there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0000 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia



"Planning on working all night Miss Bradford?" Harm asked.

"I feel like I should...there's something in the Fletcher case I'm just not seeing something important," Austin blew out a tense breath.

"Like what?? We have witnesses saying PO Hunter was traveling at a high rate of speed. The doctor we spoke to from Bethesda said that the bruises on Danielle's body were most likely caused as the result of normal toddler clumsiness. Lieutenant Farrow stated that she felt confident that Danielle was in a nurturing environment during her last home visit."

"I know all that. Something just doesn't add up though. Denise and David never let Danielle out of their sight so why was she alone in the front yard? Why wasn't the gate shut and locked?"

"No parent is perfect. They all make mistakes. Don't watch their child for one second when they should..." Harm countered putting his cover and briefcase down as he got more into the argument.

"I understand all that: It just doesn't fit the profile of this family..." Austin trailed off staring hard at the photo of little AJ on Harriet's desk. "Oh god, but it does..."

"Okay, you've officially lost me now."

"Come with me for a second if you wouldn't mind Commander," Austin said turning on her heel and heading for her office. Once inside she picked up the latest report on Denise Fletcher from Bethesda.

She read through the report from the psychiatrist carefully while Harm stood in the doorway arms crossed over his chest, head tilted to the side.

"Here it is! Listen to this: Further sessions with Mrs. Fletcher allowed the opportunity to broach the subject of her daughter's death. Patient did not seem terribly saddened by this, most likely due to her mind shielding her from reality. Stated that Danielle is in a better place now where she's not so different and everyone loves her." Belief in a higher being can be helpful in coping with immense stressors, but this should be monitored closely. Patient further stated that Danielle can be a guardian angel for our new perfect baby."

Harm nodded not quite seeing where Austin was going.

"I worked closely with the Fletchers-Denise told me how hard it was to be Danielle's mother that there were times she just didn't know if she could do it any longer. That there were days she wished Danielle was gone, that God would just take her. I've got to see Denise," Austin whispered horrified by the turn of her thoughts.

"You think Mrs. Fletcher didn't shut and lock the gate on purpose?" Harm demanded incredulously.

"I hope not, but that's exactly what I think. I think somewhere in her mind she decided that if God meant Danielle to stay with them he would keep her from going into the road and it would not be her fault."

Harm shook his head sickened by the very idea. How could a parent not want to protect their child. Especially a special needs child like Danielle?

"I have to go now. I'll let you know in the morning what I find out tonight. Depending on what it is I might need to meet with you, Colonel Mackenzie and Admiral Chegwidden."

"Regardless of what you find PO Hunter is still going to be charged with negligent operation, fatality resulting."

"Fine...that part doesn't concern me. Child Protective Services scrutinizing my program does."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0100 Zulu
Psychiatric Ward
Bethesda Naval Hospital
Bethesda, Maryland

"I don't understand what you hope to find Miss Bradford. Mrs. Fletcher is in shock about her daughter's passing," Captain Elisa Hauck said as she led the Director of  the Exceptional Family Member Program down the hall.

"I need to talk to her. I'm sincerely hoping I find nothing. Otherwise Mrs. Fletcher may well be charged with neglect by the Commonwealth of Virginia."

"She's barely 19 years old, with a Down syndrome child and pregnant with her second child. She's mentally fragile right now."

"I am aware of that!" Austin snapped. "Right now I need to talk to her. I am not going in there to upset her!"

The young woman looked up when Austin entered a small smile touching her lips. "You came to see me. I was hoping you would...that nice Commander and that Colonel came to talk to me, but I really wanted to talk to you."

"Hello Denise. How are you?" Austin asked softly.

"Danielle's gone now...Did you know? She's with God though...he took her home where she could be perfect."

"I know Denise and I'm so sorry about what happened," Austin blinked back tears, trying hard not to think of Danielle.

"It was for the best. Mom and Daddy told me it was and David will understand that too...he just needs time."

"Denise, why wasn't the gate shut and locked and why was Danielle out in the front yard alone?" Austin braced herself for the answer quite sure about what she was going to hear.

"I was talking to David...telling him about our new baby. I didn't shut or lock the gate because I knew she wouldn't go into the road unless God wanted her to."

"Denise: Listen to me!" Austin demanded in a sharp tone. "God did not want Danielle to walk into the road in front of a car."

"But she's better now. She doesn't have any problems anymore," Denise answered hesitantly as if what had happened was finally sinking in.

Austin nodded biting the inside of her cheek hard as she watched Denise Fletcher wrestle with reality.

"My baby...My Danielle...she's gone? Forever?"

Austin nodded again swiping angrily at her eyes as a tear tried to slip through her iron control. Not here, not now, she thought savagely.

"I didn't mean-I didn't mean for her to die...I didn't...but sometimes...she...that day...she was so naughty...she broke a vase my Mom gave me-bit me-I just put her outside so I wouldn't hurt...hurt her...like you told...me...I walked away before I hurt her again-I hit her...before...she cried...," Denise Fletcher broke down into wracking sobs.

Austin didn't know what to do or say for the grieving mother so she stepped outside the room noticing Captain Hauck waiting.

"She needs to talk to you-she has some things to tell you. I recommend you record them and be prepared for a call from Child Protective Services," Austin managed in a clipped tone before she strode down the hallway as quickly as she could needing to get out of that place before she broke down completely.

Austin sat behind the wheel of her car digging her cell phone from her pocket. She dialed JAG leaving messages in Harm, Mac and the Admiral's voice mail boxes. They needed to know what she had found out.

"No one ever told me this job could be so hard," Austin murmured, deciding the call to Child Protective Services was going to wait until the following morning. She couldn't bear the idea of dealing with this anymore right now. She wanted a long soak in a warm bath and her cat.

********************************************************************

1200 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia...



"I'm sorry to have called you in so early Miss Bradford, but Commander Rabb and Colonel Mackenzie are needed elsewhere. Since your message stated you had information for all of us I took the liberty of calling the meeting for now," AJ smiled as she walked through the door and took a seat in the empty leather chair.

"I spoke with Denise Fletcher last. This may not effect the case against PO Hunter, but I felt you all deserved to know. Mrs. Fletcher put Danielle in the front yard because she was angry with her and she wanted to keep herself from losing her temper. She didn't shut or lock the gate that would have kept Danielle from the road because she felt God would protect her baby if it was his will."

Austin rubbed her face tiredly when she was done speaking waiting for some reaction.

"That might make a difference in Petty Officer Hunter's defense," Mac answered scribbling a note on the legal pad she was carrying. "Not that it excuses him breaking the speed limit, but it at least bears mentioning. It might salvage his career in the Navy."

"I assume you'll be calling Child Protective Services?" AJ questioned Austin.

"I'm required by law to do so, yes. I'll also need to speak with Lieutenant Farrow and find out if she knew that Mrs. Fletcher was leaving Danielle on her own at times."

"If you need my help in any way let me know. You're free to go."

"Thank you Admiral," Austin smiled and got to her feet prompting Harm and AJ to get to their feet too until she had left the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1513 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia...



Austin took her seat on the prosecution's side of the court room stifling a yawn with the back of her hand. She was sorry to see Singer sitting at the defense table, but with Harm and Mac needed elsewhere Singer and Commander Turner had taken over the case. She couldn't wait to see how Singer used the information she had relayed that morning.

Her phone conversation with CPS had been much better than she had dared hope for. It had been a conference call with Captain Hauck, a representative from CPS and herself. Things hadn't gotten ugly or heated and the end result was the decision that Mrs. Fletcher would continue in therapy with Captain Hauck as well as taking parenting basics classes to help her learn safe and effective ways to discipline as well as care for the new baby she was carrying. Something the social worker had said stuck with Austin and she was going to be sure to share it with her Case Managers at their next meeting.

"It's such a shame...this country will spend millions on programs designed to slap a band aid on a problem after it blows up in their face. No one seems to realize or even care about how much better it would be to prevent these problems in the first place. These young mothers, barely out of diapers themselves and here they are expected to care for a baby."

Austin decided it was her goal to be sure there were parenting classes for the families she worked with. Even a support group. She knew that was part of the goal of the EFMP, but she wasn't sure if it was being carried out on all the bases. Now she would make it her business to find out.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Afghanistan...



"If I had my way we'd put explosives in every damned cave we could find and bring the whole mountain down on top of Bin Laden's head. Sick, flea-ridden bastard," Clayton Webb muttered to one of the men he was working with. He was still smarting over the suicide of Mustafa Atef following the tribunal. Now if he didn't find Kabir lord only knew what would happen.

It made him feel somewhat better to know Harm and Mac were going to be in country in the next day or so. They would be looking into the death of the civilians in the last bombing raid, but their main mission was to try and flush out Kabir.

"Keep me posted. I need to go see the local warlord and see if he's got any useful information yet."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A day or so later
Afghanistan...



Victor turned to his side, facing the wall as he threw the blankets off himself. What had gone wrong? Fareeza had promised him she would tell the villagers and farmers to stay off the road last night. She'd never make a promise she didn't intend to keep. She might not have cared about him, but she definitely cared about her people and she wouldn't want to see any of them needlessly killed.

He closed his eyes conjuring up the first time the two of them had been together. It had felt so right at the time and so wrong later on when he'd been along and thinking about it. Right or wrong he'd continued to see her every chance he had.

Austin though, what was he going to do about that?

Sick of lying there pretending to sleep Victor got up pulling on his clothes. Maybe a visit to the village and the leader would make him feel better.

He was almost surprised, almost but not quite to find Clayton Webb there. Victor had suspected the spy was around somewhere. He knew his team was reporting to Webb now but this was the first time he'd seen the spy in awhile.

Webb decided Gunny was with him, their cover being Webb was a journalist and Victor was his guide.

It was late afternoon when they stopped and Gunny spoke with Commander Rabb finding out that Fareeza had been seen with Kabir. His heart froze at that even as he defended her to his Superior Officer. Fareeza couldn't have been working with Kabir, there was no possible way. Commander Rabb's last words to him made him feel guilty all over again.

"You need to let this go for now and concentrate on the job at hand Gunny...but you'd better think real hard about what's going on. There's someone stateside who's going to need to know about this woman."

Then he'd found out about the bombing run planned for the location of Kabir's compound. Victor tried to reason with Webb, even begged a little bit desperate to keep Fareeza from being harmed. It was like talking to a wall and finally in a moment of complete frustration Victor let his fist do the talking for him, slugging Webb in the face.

Victor slugged Webb in the jaw. Now do I have your attention, Mr. Webb?

Webb punched him back before answering Yes!

They regarded each other for a moment. What do I need to know about this woman?

That Im involved with her, Sir.

"Christ Galindez...are you working on a harem now too?" Webb exhaled sharply. "One here one in the states?"

Victor raised his fist again making Webb back off a step.

"I wouldn't Gunny," Webb warned in a low voice. "How involved?"

"Involved enough," Victor shot back refusing to admit anything.

"And let me ask: Did you think at all of Miss Bradford?"

"This has NOTHING to do with her!"

Webb shook his head getting out his cell phone. "You'd be amazed how women don't necessarily feel that way when they find out they've been betrayed. I'll see what I can do about getting some ground troops to go in instead of a bombing run."

"Thank you." Gunny took a seat on the tailgate of the truck pondering Webb's words. He cared for Austin, very much so, but Fareeza had a place in his heart too. Life was never supposed to get this complicated.

******************************************************************

Remains of Kabir's Compound
Afghanistan



Victor walked away from the bodies, unable to believe what had just happened. In less than 24 hours his world had turned upside down. Fareeza was dead. He thought he'd loved her and now she was gone.

His gaze swept over Colonel Mackenzie, Commander Rabb and Clayton Webb and he remembered Austin with a sudden sick jolt. Not that he'd ever forgotten her, but ever since the night Fareeza had welcomed him into her bed Austin had faded from his immediate awareness. He'd never planned for it to happen, but it had just the same.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

"This is only about the sex Gunnery Sergeant, nothing more," Fareeza said running her hand down the length of his bare back. He was undeniably handsome, but he had someone else waiting for him at home even if he couldn't remember that now.

"Don't say that," Victor frowned lowering his lips to the throbbing pulse in her neck.

"It is true:I will never love you. You need to know that now. I will not deceive you."

"Let me just be with you," Victor whispered softly silencing any response she might have made by crushing his lips against hers.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^


That had been the beginning of it. True to her word Fareeza had never fallen in love with him, but he knew there was no sense deluding himself: he had fallen in love with her, at least in some small way.

Mac looked over at Gunny watching him walk away from the camp. She'd been worried when he'd first gotten so defensive about the idea of Fareeza working with Kabir that there was something there. Now she knew for sure. There had been something and she was also positive he needed to tell Austin about it.

She'd give him some time, Mac decided turning her attention to Webb talking on his cell phone. Maybe she'd be able to convince the spy to let Gunny use the phone to call home. This wasn't the sort of news that should be delivered by MARS-gram.

"You're thinking you're going to get involved in this aren't you Mac?" Harm questioned his partner.

"I have to...he can't do that to Austin. She deserves to know the truth."

"And what good is the truth going to do Mac? It's going to hurt her and make him feel lower than he does right now. Don't you think it would be best to just let things go and let the two of them deal with it when Gunny goes stateside again?"

"No! I can speak from experience on this. It won't make things better and might make things so much worse. He has to be honest with her and they can go from there," Mac snapped back thinking of Mic Brumby and how things had ended between them.

Harm shook his head and walked away. His opinion was to leave it alone. Combat was a whole different world and things happened that would never happen under ordinary circumstances. Gunny would probably never have looked twice at that woman at any other time. Somehow when you were in the middle of fighting and you weren't sure if you'd see the sun come up the next day or not the rules changed. You needed to connect with someone else to know that you had touched another life in some small way.

Mac wasn't going to hear him though. Harm knew her experience with Brumby was weighing heavily on this decision. He hoped maybe she'd change her mind given time and not let three lives be destroyed because of the strike.

Mac watched waiting for Clay to be done with his phone keeping one eye on Gunny who was facing away from them. She was sure he was crying, but his stiff posture didn't give that away at all.

Clay punched his phone off scowling. "Did you want me for something Mac? You've been watching me like a hawk."

"Clay I want to borrow your cell phone...well I want to borrow it for Gunny. He needs to tell Austin about what happened here and I don't think a MARS-gram is quite right for this kind of news."

Clay shook his head and shrugged. "I don't think he ought to tell her at all right now, but I'm not even getting into that with you. Here...tell him to call whomever he wants to and talk for as long as he wants...the CIA's paying for it."

"Thank you Webb...you are almost human," Mac teased alluding to the fact that at times the agent seemed to have no human feelings whatsoever.

"Hey! Don't let word get out...I've got a reputation to uphold here!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camp
Afghanistan



Mac pushed off the cot she'd been sitting on studying Webb's cell phone. He'd agreed to let Gunny use it, but like Harm he'd told Mac she should just leave it alone. She couldn't understand that, didn't either of them see that the only way to have a relationship that meant anything with anyone was to be honest?

If she'd only been honest with Mic then he wouldn't have put his life on hold in so many ways. He might not have been so hurt when it ended. Mac wasn't going to just let this go. Sure Austin was going to feel hurt and betrayed and she had every right to feel those things, but Mac still maintained that honesty was the best policy.

She walked around the camp finally finding Gunny perched on a boulder looking into the horizon with a bemused expression on his face. "Gunny?"

"Colonel, Ma'am...I'm sorry, I didn't hear you coming," Victor said jumping to his feet to stand at attention.

"As you were Gunny. I wanted to talk to you for a little bit."

"About Fareeza, Ma'am?" Victor asked regretfully.

"Yes...Gunny, I don't know what happened between the two of you and I don't know why...but don't you think there is someone else you owe an explanation to?"

"Fareeza didn't love me Ma'am. She made that clear as day from the first. I think I loved her though..."

"How did this happen Gunny?" Mac demanded sadly. Suddenly she was starting to see why Harm had maybe suggested she leave it alone.

"There was a bombing run Ma'am...I was at one of the farms that got hit with Fareeza. I don't know-I kissed her Ma'am. I had to do something to prove I was all right, so I kissed her. We went back to the village eventually and that night we were together for the first time."

"Gunny, did you love her? Do you really think you loved her?"

"I don't know Colonel-I don't know what to think right now. She sure didn't love me though. I guess that makes me some kind of fool," Victor responded ashamed of the part of him that was happy Fareeza was gone.

"I don't think that at all. Have you thought about what you need to do next?"

Victor sighed deeply nodding his head. "I have to tell Austin-god this is going to hurt her."

"Webb said you could use his cell phone and to talk as long as you wanted since this is being billed to the CIA and I think he's a little miffed at them right now," Mac handed Victor the cell phone. "I'm going back to the camp. You should come in when your call is done. It's not exactly safe to be out here alone."

"I will Colonel...and Ma'am. Thank you. I appreciate you lending an ear. I might need one again after this call."

"I'll be around Gunny...if you need to talk I'll have time for you."

*******************************************************************

0409 Zulu
Austin's Apartment
Rosslyn, Virginia

 
She was sitting at her computer rubbing her eyes when her cordless phone rang softly. Austin had been working since she'd come home at 5 to finish several reports she needed to get to Bethesda in the morning. A glance at the time display in the corner screen showed her it was now 11:09 and she'd missed supper. Again.

Something about cooking for just herself wasn't appealing. Where Austin had always been content alone and enjoyed being able to follow her own schedule now she found herself lonely and missing Victor.

"Hello?"

"Hey Aus, it's me. It's good to hear your voice."

"Vic?? Hi! Oh honey it's good to hear your voice too! Where are you? Are you all right?" Austin demanded as tiredness slipped away from her.

"I'm in Afghanistan...Mr. Webb is letting me use his cell phone. I'm fine Aus...I'm fine, but I need to tell you something."

Austin froze feeling her heart lurch in her chest. This wasn't going to be good. Victor didn't sound like himself at all. "Well...I'm sitting down. This is probably as good a time as any."

"Aus, I met someone here-"
 
Austin didn't want to hear anymore just blurted out as quickly as she could.  "That's enough Victor, this doesn't need to go any further!"

"Austin: LISTEN to me!! Just please listen!" Victor pleaded taking a deep breath before he continued. "I met someone, she reminded me of you: strong, independent, opinionated. I'm not going to lie and say nothing ever happened, but she didn't love me. I was a nice American Marine who could help her out and she made me forget this damned war for just a little bit. She's dead now. Killed...by our fire."

"You had sex with her didn't you?" Austin managed to choke out feeling her stomach roll as her heart gave another painful lurch in her chest.

So this is what it feels like when your heart breaks? Austin mused to herself while she listened to Victor's breathing on the other end of the phone. The sensation in her chest was of a sharp ache coupled with a squeezing feeling. Not at all pleasant.

"Yes," Victor's voice sounded defeated on the other end of the phone and Austin had the sudden thought that if this had been an online chat the word would have been spelled with all lower case letters.

Austin slumped back in her chair. It wasn't like they were married or anything, there was no formal commitment, no gold bands. Nothing but Victor's promise to come back soon the morning he'd left for Camp Lejeune.

There was no commitment, but Austin still felt as if she had been slapped across the face and kicked in the stomach. This just could not be real. Victor was not that kind of man, well she'd thought he wasn't at any rate though obviously she'd been wrong about that. 

"Please Aus: please, just say something."

Austin made a decision in that moment. This was about her now. Victor had been honest with her in some attempt to assuage his guilt, but she wasn't going to give him the closure of forgiving him. Maybe she never would be able to forgive him, but she sure as hell wasn't going to do it now. "I can't do this now. Stay safe Victor."

"Austin, no-please-I didn't mean to hurt you. I never meant to do that."

"That's funny, because you hurt me in the worst way possible. Don't call me again Victor, don't write, and don't bother with any MARS-grams. I don't want to speak to you. When and if I do I will let you know."

"Austin, please don't do this. I-I know I hurt you. I'm so sorry about that, but please don't let this be the end."

"You made that decision Victor when you took another woman to bed."

She could hear the tears in his voice with his next words. "Aus, please...this can't be the end. It can't be."

A tear slid haltingly down her cheek as she bit her lip for several seconds drawing blood before she felt in control enough to speak. Austin was not going to cry for him now. He didn't deserve it. "Then how come it is?"

With that Austin hung up the phone and turned the ringer off. She didn't want to talk to him right now. Maybe never again, but for certain not right this minute. 

Numb, trying to make sense of what he'd just told her, Austin logged out of her computer and went into the bedroom falling down on her bed where she sobbed brokenly for what had been lost until the sun came up the next morning.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1100 Zulu
Roberts' New Home...

Harriet smiled and hummed happily to herself as she moved around her new kitchen preparing breakfast. She loved the house and couldn't wait to show it to Bud. She knew he'd love it as much as she did.

A quick glance at the answering machine let her know she had two new messages and Harriet wondered why she hadn't heard the phone ring the night before, finally remembering that she'd shut the ringer off while she'd been giving little AJ a bath.

"Hi Lieutenant Sims-uh-Harriet, I mean. This is Gunny.  I wouldn't normally call you, but I had to. I'm worried about Austin. I told her something last night that hurt her. She hung up on me and didn't answer her phone when I tried calling back. Please check on her-make sure she's okay. I won't go into what happened Ma'am I-I'm sure Austin will tell you herself. Just please make sure she's okay for me. I'm worried about her."

Harriet frowned wondering what had happened pressing next to skip to the next message.

"Harriet, this is Austin. I'm not going to work today. I'm not feeling well at all and I haven't had any sleep. Please let the Admiral know for me. I faxed in some paperwork: would you see that it gets to Bethesda for me. I know we had plans for this weekend, but I'm canceling them. I need to get out of town for awhile. I'll call you when I get back."

Something was seriously wrong Harriet thought worriedly. Breakfast could wait. She wanted to drop by Austin's apartment and make sure she was okay.

************************************************************

Afghanistan...



Clayton Webb approached Victor Galindez carefully, but just as loudly as he could. The last thing he wanted was to have the Gunny shoot him for sneaking up on him. He did want his cell phone back though. Assuming Gunny's talk hadn't gone so badly he'd tossed the thing into a mine field.

"I suppose you want your phone back?" Victor's voice was rough with the tears he'd shed since Austin had told him it was over then hung up.

He'd tried to call her back several times then resorted to calling Lieutenant Sims to get her to check on Austin. He had to know she was okay. Even if they never spoke again he didn't want to think he was responsible for something awful happening to her. And if something awful did happen he didn't know what he would do.

"Yes, as long as you're done with it."

"Here," Gunny handed it back rubbing his eyes across his shirt sleeve.

"You've been sitting out here since Mac came to talk to you and give you my phone, huh?" Clay asked conversationally. "I'm going to hazard a guess that it didn't go well."

"Depends. Is it a good sign when they tell you it's over and hang up on you?" Victor asked bitterly.

Clay winced shaking his head. "Not usually. Give her time though...it had to come as a shock and she's reacting emotionally now. Miss Bradford's a logical woman, she won't be angry forever."

"I hurt her...and for what? Someone who made it clear she didn't love me...That makes me a world class ass at best. Why don't you go now...I need some time alone."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1400 Zulu
SecNav's Office
Washington DC...

"Sir...you have a fax here from Miss Bradford."

"Hmm," the Secretary took the fax from his yeoman looking at the cover sheet quizzically. "I wasn't expecting anything...perhaps it's about the Fletcher case."

"Perhaps Mr. Secretary. I'll give you time to read it and respond if necessary. Let me know when you are ready to go over today's schedule."

The Secretary nodded and walked into his office settling behind his desk before he started reading the fax. By the time he was to the end his face was red with fury and he bellowed out the door. "GET ME ADMIRAL CHEGWIDDEN ON THE PHONE NOW!"

Several minutes later his yeoman's voice came over the intercom. "Admiral Chegwidden on Line 1 sir."

"AJ what the HELL is going on in your office?!"

"I'm not sure what you mean Mr. Secretary."

"I have a letter of resignation from Miss Bradford here in my hands. What the hell did you people do to her?"

"Resignation?! Sir, as far as I knew she wasn't feeling well today and took the day off. I had no idea she was planning on resigning."

"Well you'd better find out what's going on Admiral. If she does resign I am holding you fully responsible!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

1410 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia...



AJ looked at his phone as he hung it up. He'd be responsible if Austin Bradford quit?? How could that possibly be his fault? Fortunately he knew SecNav was only blowing off steam. Still he wanted to get to the bottom of that resignation letter. She didn't strike him as the type to run from anything and as far as he knew the job was going very well for her.

"Tiner, is Lieutenant Sims in yet?" AJ questioned in the intercom.

"Not yet sir...she called to say she'd be a few minutes late."

"Hmm...Thank you Tiner. When she does come in let her know I'd like to speak with her."

"Of course Sir."

He got to work looking at the cases that had come across his desk not looking up until he heard a knock on his door. "Enter."

Harriet walked in looking faintly upset. "You wanted to see me Sir?"

"Yes Lieutenant...come in and have a seat please. Close the door behind you."

Harriet did as requested taking a seat before she met the Admiral's gaze.

"Lieutenant...I got a call from SecNav this morning. He was not happy to put it mildly. Have you seen Miss Bradford today?"

"No sir...Permission to speak freely Admiral?"

"Granted."

"Sir, I got a message from Gunny asking me to check on Austin to be sure she was okay...then Austin left a message saying she wouldn't be in today and she was canceling our plans for this weekend. I went to her apartment and knocked on the door, but she wouldn't answer. I tried calling, but she let the machine take it."

"That doesn't sound like Miss Bradford...You said Gunny asked you to check on her?" AJ was getting an idea of what might be wrong. Lord it was hard to stay out of the lives of his staff when they were so good at screwing things up at every turn.

"He did...Sir, I'm really concerned. It would have to be bad for Austin not to answer her phone. Maybe if you went and tried to talk to her?" Harriet suggested hopefully.

"Oh no Lieutenant...the last thing I want to do is get in the middle of personal troubles," AJ shook his head thinking over SecNav's threat. And if he didn't get involved and Austin left then he'd be in trouble anyhow. Plus she was good at what she did...the EFMP needed someone like her heading it.

"Oh please sir...you've always helped me when I've had problems. You helped me with my wedding Admiral...and delivered little AJ."

"Lieutenant...I can't just barge into Miss Bradford's personal life or her apartment uninvited. Wedding planning and delivering babies is an entirely different thing."

"I know Sir, I was just hoping you'd know what to do to get her to let me in or something...I don't want to see her shut everyone out right now. She was there for me after Baby Sarah-Sir, I owe Austin a lot. I know whatever this is I can help her work through it, if she'll just let me."

"I'll call and leave a message for her Lieutenant...perhaps if we haven't heard from her by the end of the day we can drive by and make sure she's all right."

"Oh Admiral that would be wonderful..." Harriet gushed. "I really have to get to work now...but if you talk to Austin will you please let her know I'm worried about her and I want to know she's okay."

"I will do that Lieutenant. Dismissed."

******************************************************************

2145 Zulu
Austin's Apartment
Rosslyn, Virginia...



Austin collapsed on her sofa reaching for another Kleenex to wipe more tears from her eyes. If there had ever been a time in her life she'd felt this bad before Austin couldn't remember it.

"The w-worst...part...the v-v-very worst part...is I trusted him. I believed he wouldn't hurt me," she sniffled to Daisy who was stretched out along the back of the sofa sleeping.

She reached for the remote control then changed her mind and just settled down, pulling a blanket over herself. She needed some sleep: Austin had spent most of the night crouched over the toilet with dry heaves, cursing Victor Galindez with everything she had while her heart shattered into a million pieces in her chest.

She drifted off into a deep sleep not waking completely even when she heard someone knocking on her door some undisclosed amount of time later.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2300 Zulu



"She's home Sir, I know she is...her car is in the lot. We have to go in and make sure she's okay," Harriet said worriedly wringing her hands while the Admiral knocked on the door.

"Miss Bradford, It's Admiral Chegwidden and Lieutenant Sims...please open up and let us in. Lieutenant Sims is very worried about you and you and I need to talk."

"I have a key, Sir. Let me just find it...we need to go in there," Harriet suggested as she began to dig through her purse finally finding the key at the bottom.

"All right Lieutenant, you go in. I'll wait out here until Miss Bradford is ready to face me," AJ smiled and leaned against the wall. "And you can let her know I will stand outside this apartment until she speaks with me, no matter how long that may take."

Harriet grinned at the idea as she unlocked the door. She walked in. "Austin?"

AJ was studying the crown molding around the ceiling in the hallway when he heard Harriet's horrified gasp.

"Oh god! Admiral...come quick!!"

AJ went in finding Harriet standing in front of Austin's kitchen table looking in horror at what was sitting before her. He felt his own stomach drop when he saw the assorted over the counter medications, a few prescription bottles, a handgun and some kitchen knives. "Oh dear god."

"Sir, she couldn't have...she couldn't...oh no..." Harriet wailed softly pressing her hand over her mouth.

"Let's find her Harriet...that's what's important now. We need to find her before we jump to any conclusions," AJ ordered patting her shoulder as he moved through the kitchen into the living area. Though how anyone could look at what was sitting on the table and not jump to some pretty horrifying conclusions was beyond him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kandahar, Afghanistan...



"Gunny, don't you need to be getting some rest?" Mac asked as she approached him.

"No Ma'am, I can't sleep..." Victor sighed deeply fingering the picture in his hands. "I found this under my pillow Colonel."

Mac took the picture he was offering her smiling at the photo. "You two look very happy."

"We were Ma'am...we were. That's what kills me h-here," Gunny paused biting his lip hard. "I was happy with Austin...I loved her...then I came here, to this place and threw that all away."

Mac smiled softly at the picture. "I spent some time with Austin the day you left for Camp Lejeune Gunny...she loves you. I'm sure she still loves you, even now at this moment. She's just hurt and she needs time."

"She's got all the time she needs Ma'am...my tour here was due to be up in July: I talked with the CO and I'm staying at least until September: longer if they'll let me," Gunny answered wearily rubbing his face. "God I screwed this up so badly...Poor Austin."

"Gunny," Mac kept her voice soft as she spoke. He seemed to be in enough pain all ready...she wasn't going to do him any favors by yelling at him or being harsh. "I want you to go try to get some sleep. If you're tired you're going to be a liability to your unit. I can make it a direct order if I have to."

"You don't have to Colonel...I guess nothing but time is going to heal this one. Thank you Ma'am...you were right, I owed Austin the truth even if it destroyed what we had."

"Get some rest Gunny," Mac ordered softly handing him back the photo before she continued her own walk through the Camp.

"You give good advice Ninja Girl...you should follow it. You need some rest too," Harm suggested stepping out of the shadows.

"Probably. Harm, you were right: I should have stayed out of Gunny's business. I just ruined his relationship with Austin."

"I don't think you ruined it Mac: Austin's tough and Gunny's tough: they'll get through it and I bet they come out on the other side together and stronger for it," Harm soothed. "Now let's go get some sleep."

"I suppose," Mac sighed watching Gunny's retreating figure enter the enlisted men's hut.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2310 Zulu
Austin's Apartment
Rosslyn, Virginia...



"I found her Lieutenant," AJ said in a quiet voice peering over the back of the sofa. Her cheeks were tear stained and combined with the dark circles under her eyes that was the only color on her face. She appeared to be sleeping and when he saw her eyes shift under her lids he let out the breath he'd been unconsciously holding. "Why don't you come and try to wake her?"

Harriet nodded and rushed to Austin's side while AJ retreated to the kitchen to get rid of the items on the table.

"Austin, it's Harriet...come on Austin, wake up," Harriet cooed in her best motherly tone shaking her friend gently.

"Mmm..." Austin moaned softly and pulled the blanket up over her head.

"Please Aus, I've been so worried about you all day...then I came in-Oh Austin, all that stuff on your table: please tell me you didn't use any of it."

"H-Harriet?" Austin mumbled shaking her head as she pulled the blanket down to look at her friend. She'd had just enough sleep to feel sluggish and drugged. "Why're you here?"

"I was worried about you Aus...Gunny left a message on my answering machine. He wanted me to check on you," Harriet watched tears well in Austin's eyes as she spoke and handed her friend a Kleenex when the first drop slid down her cheek.

"I'm o-okay."

"I doubt that young lady!"

Austin gasped at the sharp voice and turned her head to see the Admiral standing in the doorway to the kitchen arms crossed over his chest looking as fierce as she'd ever seen him look. "A-Admiral Chegwidden."

"I got a call at 0900 this morning from SecNav and then one every hour on the hour after that. He wanted to know if I'd talked to you yet. Seems he received a fax from you which he found extremely upsetting. Lieutenant Sims was concerned as well...and since I saw your kitchen table I have to say I'm quite concerned myself."

"Aus, I want you to pack a bag and come home with me. I don't want you to be alone right now," Harriet said getting to her feet and taking a seat beside her friend. "I have a wonderful guestroom for you and little AJ would love to have you stay."

"Can't-Daisy."

"Daisy can come with you. I mean it Austin: I am not taking no for an answer!"

"Okay, okay...just let me go pack some stuff."

Harriet watched her friend shuffle off sadly. "Oh Sir, Austin never gives in this easily...something is so wrong."

"I wouldn't push her Lieutenant, let her tell you in her own time. Obviously something has hurt her badly."

"I know Sir...and I wish Gunny were here so I could punch him in the face. If he did this to her he'd better be glad he's in Afghanistan."

The Admiral smiled and chuckled moving from the doorway to take Austin's bag when she emerged from the bedroom.

"Did you use any of the things you left on the table Austin?" He questioned in a stern, fatherly tone. He was beyond being formal with her at this point.

She shook her head looking up at him. "I thought about it...I got everything I could think of out and thought about it...but I looked at it all and I couldn't do it...I j-j-just couldn't do it."

"That's a good thing...I want you to go home with Lieutenant Sims and get a good night's rest. In the morning if you feel up to it, I would like to talk to you and I'm sure SecNav would as well."

"I-I don't think I can face him yet," Austin sniffled.

"Then if you talk to me I can relay the pertinent information to him," AJ promised smiling kindly.

"Thank you Sir."

"Please...it's AJ, and you're welcome."

******************************************************************

0115 Zulu
Roberts' Home...



Slumping into the chair wearily, Austin let a huge sigh escape. It did feel better to be here with Harriet and little AJ, even if Daisy had deserted her for the little boy as soon as she'd been let out of her carrier.

"There...all tucked in. Are you sure you don't want anything to eat Austin? I have some Tomato soup left and I can make you a sandwich or something. You really should eat," Harriet said.

"I know, but right now I can't. I'm just not hungry and I'd rather not force the issue," Austin stretched back in the chair arching to relieve the kinks in her spine.

"All right, but if you get hungry help yourself," Harriet reminded taking a seat on the sofa. "You don't have to tell me about it if you don't want to Austin, but I have to ask what happened."

Austin shrugged. "It's okay...there's not much to tell Victor and I are over."

"WHAT?" Harriet gasped in shock.

"We're through. He called me last night to tell me he'd been sleeping with someone in Afghanistan: a local woman from what I could gather in our short conversation. He felt like he needed to be honest with me," Austin rolled her eyes. "I appreciate his honesty, but I can't believe he did that to me."

"Oh Austin...Oh I'm so sorry...I can't believe he did that to you!" Harriet grumbled indignantly.

"It's water under the bridge. I told him we were through and when I go back home I'm going to box up everything of his that's at my apartment and bring it back to his place. I know where he keeps his key for my apartment too so I'm going to take it back and leave my key to his place."

"That seems pretty final. Don't you think maybe you should give this some time and not close the door right now?"

"No," Austin answered flatly. "As a matter of fact I think I'm going to start looking for a new apartment for myself. You've moved now and it would be nice to have a place he's never been in."

"I support you 100% Aus, you know that, but don't make any rash decisions...give yourself some time to think."

"Oh I will...I'm going to be extremely choosy about my new place. Not just any place will do."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0350 Zulu
Roberts' Home



Hi Sweetie!

Harriet smiled as the message window popped up on the computer. "Hi yourself Bud! How are you?"

Good...missing you and little AJ. How are things at home?

"They're good. AJ is getting so big. He carries a picture of you around all the time." Harriet typed wondering if she should tell Bud about Gunny and Austin.

That's sweet. I miss the little guy. How is everyone at JAG?

"Fine. Austin is spending a few days with AJ and I."

Really? Tell her I said hi.

"I'll do that. Oh Bud, Austin and Gunny broke up. Poor Austin is so upset about it."

That's too bad :( I'm sure Austin is going to be fine though: she's strong. Just remind her to take care of herself and take it one day at a time.

"I have and I'm going to continue to remind her."

That's my Harriet. I love you sweetie: I've got to go now...the Captain just had me paged to the bridge.

Harriet sighed, their chats just never lasted long enough for her. "Okay. You take care Bud, get plenty of rest... I love you. :) AJ loves you too."

After she had logged off the computer Harriet went to check on her son smiling to find him sleeping peacefully. She walked by the guestroom noticing that the door was ajar and stopped. Austin was an adult and perfectly capable of taking care of herself, but Harriet had an overwhelming urge to mother her friend.

She eased the door open and peered around it, seeing Austin curled on her side in the middle of the bed. She was breathing deeply and she appeared to be asleep: good, sleep was just what she needed. Harriet eased the door almost shut again and headed for her own bedroom.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next afternoon...
1845 Zulu
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, Virginia...



"Do you really plan to resign Miss Bradford?" AJ Chegwidden asked after Austin had been shown into his office by Tiner.

She shrugged and sank into one of the chairs. "Would you label me a quitter if I did?" she challenged in a soft voice.

"I've learned not to label people or judge them on one act," AJ countered. "I would like to say that I feel you leaving the EFMP would be a huge loss. SecNav seconds my opinion."

"You two actually agreed on something," Austin laughed, a harsh short sound.

AJ grinned "It was bound to happen sooner or later."

He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Miss Bradford, this is absolutely none of my business and I am not trying to pry for details, but I'd like to offer you a word of advice. When Gunny comes back home the two of you need to sit down and talk."

"Thank you for the advice Admiral, but with all due respect as far as I am concerned Victor Galindez can rot in Hell."

AJ exhaled sharply and nodded his head. "You do what's best for you: that's what matters here. Now...about your resignation."

"I don't want to resign," Austin answered flatly.

"Well good...that will relieve our esteemed Secretary I'm sure. As for the other matter: take a few days off to relax and regroup. I'll expect to see you Monday morning."

"Thank you Sir," Austin fiddled with the straps of her purse momentarily before lifting her head to look at him. "Sir, I'd like to apologize if I worried you yesterday."

"Apology accepted Miss Bradford," AJ smiled. "I'm sure you're anxious to get out of here. You're free to leave."

"Thank you Sir."

*********************************************************

0020 Zulu
Friday Evening
Roberts' Home...



"Aus, are you almost ready?" Harriet called from the hallway as she looked over the list she'd made for Tiner. He'd offered to baby sit so that she and Austin could go out. Harriet thought some drinks at McMurphy's might perk her friend up.

"I'm ready," Austin answered stepping into the hallway.

"Great...Tiner is downstairs with AJ playing with his Duplos. So if you're ready we can leave."

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be. I'm telling you though Harriet. I don't really want to be going out tonight. I'd be as happy just staying here," Austin tried again to convince her friend that going out wasn't necessary, but Harriet wasn't going to be swayed.

"We're going. We won't stay out late, but you need to get out and have some fun."

"All right...I guess you're right," Austin conceded in a defeated tone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Several hours later
McMurphy's...



"Let's go Harriet, I'm getting tired," Austin nudged her friend hoping to just convince her it was time to go. If she had much more "fun" she was afraid she'd be ready to jump off a roof soon.

"Oh look...there's the Admiral...and Commander Turner," Harriet said ignoring Austin's plea as she waved to the two men.

"Good evening ladies," AJ smiled walking over to them. "It's good to see you Miss Bradford."

"Please...we're not at JAG...you can call me Austin."

"What will you have ladies? I'm buying," Sturgis asked signaling the bartender.

"A strawberry daiquiri for me and Austin's drinking soda," Harriet smiled.

"Before I forget Austin, Maria Galindez called to speak with you today."

"That's funny, Tiner never mentioned that she'd called for me," Austin replied.

"Ah-well...she called my private line..." AJ stumbled over the words hoping he wasn't turning red as he spoke.

"Oh...well, she knows how to reach me if she wants to talk to me," Austin answered. The last thing she wanted to do was talk to Victor's sister.

AJ put a hand on Austin's shoulder squeezing it gently. "She's concerned about you...don't be too quick to jump to conclusions."

"I'm sorry," Austin muttered dropping her gaze to the bar.

"No need to apologize to me," AJ reassured her before continuing "Would you like to talk about it a little bit. I may not understand completely, but I'm a good listener."

"I thought you didn't like to get involved in the social lives of those who work in your office?"

AJ shrugged. "You don't really work for me. And hell, let's be honest...I'm a nosy old man. I like to have my fingers in every pot."

"Sure, I'd like to talk. Maybe you can help me understand."

"Harriet, Sturgis: Austin and I are going to take our drinks over there for a bit," AJ motioned to an empty table near the back of the bar.

"Okay Sir," Harriet smiled. She'd known the Admiral would know just what to say to get Austin to talk to him. Harriet had tried to get Austin to chat with Bud, but had no luck there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Afghanistan...



Victor walked around the camp looking for Webb. He'd heard the spy was going back to DC for a few days and he wanted to try and talk him into seeing Austin.

"Word is you're looking for me Galindez," Webb said stepping out of a hut and falling into step with him.

"I heard you're going stateside-"

Webb held up his hand to halt Victor. "I am not getting in the middle of this Gunny. There's nothing I can say to Miss Bradford to make this better. You'll have to deal with it when your tour is up. Assuming you don't chicken out again and decide to just move over here."

"I wasn't aware that was an option Webb," Victor grumbled.

"Trust me Galindez...staying here in hopes that she will calm down is not the way to go. Go home and face the music in July."

"I'll have to think about it I guess," Victor sighed walking off by himself. Why had he ever been so stupid? How was he ever going to make Austin see he really did love her now?

He slumped down beside a boulder again at the edge of the camp thinking about his talk with Maria. That hadn't gone well at all. Victor could still hear Maria's voice raised in fury as she read him the riot act for what he'd done. He'd deserved every word of what she'd said, but that hadn't stopped it from hurting

Are you completely insane Victor?? YOU SLEPT WITH ANOTHER WOMAN???? Maria's first words to him after he'd told her his news still echoed in his mind.

"Yeah sis...I'm completely nuts...and completely alone," Victor whispered into the night sky. He'd tried Austin's number a few other times and gotten no answer. He didn't dare call Lieutenant Sims again: she was going to kill him for sure.

"I'm gonna make this right with you Austin: one way or another I am going to make this right," Victor vowed pushing to his feet so he could go gather his gear for patrol."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

0550 Zulu
McMurphy's...



"I'm not saying forgive him right away...and I'm damn sure not justifying what Gunny did, but I think you owe him at least the chance to apologize," AJ suggested gingerly to Austin after she'd spilled her heart to him.

"Yeah, but that would make him feel better not me. He betrayed me...he slept with another woman!"

"Granted. Now this is going to make me sound like the worst kind of male chauvinist pig there is...but just hear me out. I don't think that woman was a threat to your relationship with Gunny. he turned to her out of desperation. I saw it happen a lot in Viet Nam...guys so scared and confused they didn't know what they were doing half the time. It never excused their actions, but it explained them a little. Combat is different, you face your mortality and you realize just how fragile life is. That's bound to have an effect on a person. It often makes them do things they would never consider in another time and place."

"I agree with all that, but it doesn't mean I have any desire to forgive him anytime soon," Austin sighed running her fingertip over the polished surface of the wooden table. "The worst of this is that I miss him."

"You're a good woman Austin...Gunny's a lucky man."

Austin snorted a laugh at those words, rolling her eyes. "I'm sure he isn't feeling too lucky right now."

"Nope, I bet not, but that's okay...you women are supposed to keep us men on our toes."

Austin went still and rigid as another song began spilling from the jukebox. "Oh not this one..." she moaned softly.

"This song?"

"Yes...You're Gone by Diamond Rio...it makes me cry. Every...damn...time..." Austin sniffled.

AJ nodded listening to the words pondering how it was the people who wrote country music knew just how to rip your heart right out of your chest. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a handkerchief handing it to Austin.

"Don't cry too many tears: He's not gone Austin. You've hit an obstacle. You can get past it or you can stay stuck right where you are. Only you can decide which it'll be."

"I want to get past it," She whispered tearfully.

"Then you will," AJ promised softly patting her shoulder as Harriet bustled over having seen her friend take the Admiral's handkerchief.

"Looks like Austin has had enough of my senile ramblings for one evening. Might be best to go home now Harriet."

"I think you're right Sir...c'mon Aus."

Austin nodded and got to her feet dabbing at her eyes with the handkerchief again before she smiled at AJ. "You aren't that old...and thank you. I don't like what happened any better than I did, but I think I understand a little bit now."

She followed Harriet out of the bar. Austin knew she wasn't ready to speak to Victor yet and it was probably going to take time before she was ready, but that was okay. When he came home the two of them would talk.

THE END